Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
