HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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