I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
