Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
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