He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Randomize
