Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
