he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
