What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize