I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
