I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Your cock deserves a montage
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize
