It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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