He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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