Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
