shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Randomize
