I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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