using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
