WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
he was CRYING into my vagina
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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