Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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