he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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