As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
