Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize