if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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