yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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