I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
