Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
my liver is dry heaving
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize