Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
He better not be in your backpack
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
Randomize