she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize