I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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