My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Randomize
