So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
