I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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