office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
where are my pants?
in the oven.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
