oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Moan for me like Helen Keller
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize