I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
be right there i have to get my cape
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
