i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Even my vagina gasped.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
