its not stalking. its research.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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