do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
