Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
