He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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