No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Randomize
