He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize