You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
is wine microwaveable?
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Randomize