was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize