we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
this boner is exhausting
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
