Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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