wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
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