I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
