I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Randomize
