you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
