Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize