Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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