would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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